I have lied and lost my wife. I have chosen poorly repeatedly , learning too slowly about myself and her needs. I realize now too late that I have been judged by her and found wanting. I don't communicate enough, this I know , I am a work in progress.We all bring the sum of our previous experiences to our marriages , this is history vs. history . Sometimes its the Hatfield s and McCoy s.
I have asked for forgiveness and have been denied , I have taken to my knees to repent my sins and seek God forgiveness in her stead. It is my greatest prayer to ease the damage done to my wonderful boys as I cannot comprehend the affect it will have on their lives. I only pray God will ease the pain in their hearts when they learn of the impending divorce.
When will I learn ? I was a " husband" and part of a " family" , now I feel like an empty shell of a man. Lost and I will never allow anyone else to come between me and my children. Never looking for a companion , a " replacement for my former mate" , I guess I will just get a dog ( if the dog will have me).
